(Skim)

The days of the scenic and unique mixed farm are gone. No one ceptin’ robotic corporations with oodles of cash even deal in milk. Robots even do the milking. Soon it will be the last time in North America a human hand even touches a warm bovine teat. An era will have passed – as so many nostalgic agricultural eras before it.
There was a time when raw town and city kids didn’t get milk. Oh, they got milk all right. They just didn’t understand milk. Some kind of chemically overloaded molecularly bashed up composition of part mammary juice, part unknown imported fish juice, and unknown white grain flour. But that stuff isn’t milk. It’s a pathetic imitation of milk. But the lobbyists down in capital cities pour money into advertiser’s, politician’s, and educator’s purses alike to have the poor naive consumer think it’s milk. Even school kids are led to believe the stuff is God’s gift to nutrition and you get it in a store. This disconnect is a wide as the sneakers to child labor one.
Milk comes directly from a cow. You put a pail under the cow and skillfully manipulate the udders extensions to squirt it in a pail. After there seems to be no more, you take the pail somewhere and let it sit. After awhile you find some willing young child slave or do the next step yourself. This involves using a spoon or similar item to skim off the thicker stuff on top. That stuff is called cream. The oil in it makes it rise. You can do all kinds of neat things with cream, like make whipped cream, butter, or cheese. But what’s left over is called skim milk. It has a subtle tinge of blue to it. It tastes real, not like that fancy named homo-whatever stuff that comes in waxed cardboard boxes that can never be opened so as they don’t spill.

In response to Canada's Online News Act and Meta (Facebook and Instagram) removing access to Canada's local news from their platforms, Anchor Media Inc encourages you to get your news directly from your trusted source by bookmarking this site and downloading the Rogue Radio App. Send your news tips, story ideas, pictures, and videos to info@anchormedia.ca.

About the author

Jai Murugan

Humour is funny, (pun intended) in that it is so personal. One person's joke is another's insult, and all that. So I write for the Art of a Chuckle.


What's Playing on CFTR

Launch Player in New Window 

RSS BLANKET CLASSIFIEDS – Alberta-Wide Weekly Classified Ads

  • BEST Cash Payouts for Gold
    Canadian Prairie Pickers is Number One inBEST Cash Payouts for Gold | BEST Cash Payouts for SilverBEST Customer Service | MOST Friendly StaffNever any fees to pay. No obligation to sell.Let us come to visit you in the comfort and privacy of your home. Your satisfaction is #1Call Ted or Joy 1-825-966-4373. Alberta’s #1 Buyer […]
  • For Sale: WHITE SPRUCE TREES
    WHITE SPRUCE TREES: 5’ average $50. Installation ONLY $19. Includes: hole augered, Wurzel Dip enzyme injection, bark mulch application, staking. Minimum order 25. One-time fuel charge: $150 – 225. Crystal Springs. 403-820-0961. Quality guaranteed. Ad Category: For Sale
  • Hiring: Reporter/Photographer
    THE LAKESIDE LEADER is hiring a reporter/photographer for an ongoing, full-time position in Slave Lake. Must have own car and camera. Email resume to: joemc@lakesideleader.com. Ad Category: Employment Opportunities