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  • Chestermerians Excited by New Developers, Say New Developers

    Courtesy of:

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    Toronto-Based ‘Stak M. N. Pakm’ Development is pleased to report that 100% of Chestermerians they polled are overjoyed and elated at their new proposed project “The Oak Meadows of Songbird Harbour,” a mortgage-friendly new suburban development with homes starting in the low 700’s (before upgrades and running water).

    John Tubeau, CEO of Stak M. N. Pakm developments says they named it “The Oak Meadows of Songbird Harbour” because it sounded like it would attract buyers and they found some nice stock photography that made it look like there would be happiness there.

    “We got a great deal on bulk grey siding and shingles and once we get the bylaws changed, we won’t even need to put in trees or landscaping. We’re going to make a killing off your town,” said Tubeau, adding, “who needs yards? Kids won’t even need to play outside with our exciting new windowless unfinished basement option, now available on all our comfort-plus family fun packages.”

    Residents are invited to share any opposition to the development by sending a telegram between the hours of 2 and 4 am this Monday.

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    1 Comment

    1. R Samulenok

      May 18, 2021 at 10:18 am

      Humorous article, but surprisingly close to fact. Does this remind anyone of Slokker Homes recent plan to pave over our treasured green space?